Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child

Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child

Men used to be men – now, many of them still live with their parents and play video games 12 hours a day. Here’s the Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child.

I’m not pointing the finger at anyone really because I was a man-child myself, but in a different way.

This New Year’s of 2018, I stopped one of the longest, most insidious, 37 year old addictions: Rocking.

Yes, I rocked back and forth – like an Autistic adult.

I’ve been doing this ever since I was 8 while watching the “Muppet Show” with my parents.

Luckily, my parents were cool and never questioned it, and back then not many people were label crazy and tried getting me to see a counselor.

It was a happy childhood – living in a sheltered town of 7,000 people.

But, being 45 now, and wanting to bring in more light and love, and maturity, all addictions had to go.

I literally killed my old identity in a hotel room New Year’s day.

My wife, who is an energy healer, performed the “Death Rites” on me – a Shamanic practice of killing the old you and bringing in a completely new you.

Over the years, I have slowly knocked off an addiction or two – including alcohol, cigarettes and porn – now I added sugar, rock music, and rocking.

Yes – even rock music had to go because it did cause adrenalin to flow and made me crave “more.”

Just craving “more” is a dangerous place to be for an addict.

How to Stop Escaping

While quitting these addictions, I noticed that I was basically an empty shell of a man.

I was so used to escaping into my addictions and other distractions, that I didn’t form normal “coping skills.”

If things got bad, I simply retreated into seclusion with my addiction of choice – sometimes stacking addiction upon addiction in one night and still being left unsatisfied and feeling empty.

Now, I want to fill up that empty shell of a man, which led me to really think about what elements or aspects make up a man.

Here’s the Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child

One – Independent

One of the biggest indicators that you have officially become a man is to be financially independent; you don’t need mom and dad’s help in covering your bills.

When I was 18, my dad kicked me out of the house whether I was ready or not – back then we butted heads a lot, so leaving wasn’t super hard, but I was instantly super poor and slept on friend’s floors for a few years.

Being on my own at an early age only made me stronger because the survival instinct kicked in.

Two – Not Dependent on fictional characters from TV and Video Games

There is a huge video game epidemic around the world and there’s already a lot of video game treatment centers in Asia – a few people have already died from playing videos more than sustaining their bodies with things like water and food.

TV is no better, with very addictive shows like Game of Thrones, it’s incredibly hard NOT to watch TV. The average American watches like 6 hours a night. Unplug that crap and turn your own life into something just as entertaining.

Three – Not Swirly or Secretive or down right Sociopathic

Real men can look people in the eyes and not look away. Man-children usually do weird things behind closed doors, like masturbate to video game characters, so they feel shame and can’t really look anyone in the eyes.

Once you stop doing secretive, shameful things, you can then look anyone in the eyes.

Four – Takes Ownership – Not a victim

Real men realize that they have crafted their own life, just like a fine beer. If something arises that is unsavory, they take responsibility in resolving it, rather than blaming everything and everyone around them.

When I was getting arrested and cheated on, I pretty much knew I had created that. Now, as I live a life of my dreams, those bad things cease to happen.

Five – Empathy – can feel someone else’s emotions or see through their eyes

Man-childs are usually underdeveloped mentally and cannot experience the emotions of another person. They only care about what they can get for themselves. Some man-childs are borderline sociopaths and fantasize regularly how they can become the next Unibomber.

Six – Vulnerable – can cry

Real men can share their whole range of emotion and can cry just as easily as laughing. Real men of today are not the real men of the 80’s and 90’s where they all thought they couldn’t cry, because their fathers would whip them.

Seven – Humble – Not an egomaniac

Real men realize early on that life always has the upperhand. There will always be a person or experience that is bigger and badder than them.

The best method to harmonize with a good life is to stop fighting it or trying to defy it – you will only struggle more battling upstream; Turn around, let go, and let the river of life carry you easily to your destination.

Eight – Not a Sexist – Women Rock

Man-childs don’t have another maturity to see a woman as an equal – they only see their first “crush” who hurt them badly in fourth grade.

Nine – Seeking higher meaning and is teachable

Real men understand that there is a higher power at play here – and they want to comprehend it as much as possible. Real men have usually undergone some powerful, spiritual journey and want to understand more.

Ten – Honors himself and others

Real men understand that their body and mind is a temple to be revered, not destroyed by trashy TV and trashy food. They also honor their parents, grandparents, and others in general. There is always something to learn from everybody – no matter what age, race, or gender.


Thanks for reading the Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child.

There is nothing more satisfying then becoming a man – even if it’s in your forties.

Check out my Actualized Man page for more tips on becoming a cool motherfu…



Erik Christian Johnson is a full-time blogger, self-development advocate, and full-time network marketing Entrepreneur.

All articles are solely used for educational purposes and merely the opinion of the blog writers. Please refer to the Disclaimer page for full disclosure.

2 thoughts on “Top 10 Ways How to Stop Being a Man-Child”

  1. Hi Erik

    I’m 36. In the same boat as you were when you were my age.

    I want to finally grow out of my “man child” phase. I am not a video games addict or financially dependent on anyone but I have several other afflictions that you describe in this list.

    I like to masturbate. A lot. Even at this age. As a result, I am unable to sustain an interest in real women. Most of my one night stands were with prostitutes or cheating wives. The last time I was in a relationship, I was maybe 22. So, I don’t really have much experience with women and relationships — the give and take aspect of it.

    I often look away when people stare at me. It makes me feel very uncomfortable. I never take a stand on any righteous issues because I am so cocooned in this rich inner world of my own creation that others’ problems just don’t register in my brain.

    I am a procrastinator and often fail at completing a job I was handed to perform well.

    Marriage and children? Don’t even think of those ideas anymore. Most women can sense that inner man-child in me and they quickly lose interest.

    All around me, I see men my age, and even younger, who have started their own families and raising kids. Taking care of adult responsibilities in a natural way. It makes me feel so insecure and vulnerable.

    When confronted by others, I back down real fast. Because I don’t perform my manly duty of standing my ground and fight for my rights and those of my loved ones. I’d rather masturbate to some porn videos.

    I want to get serious now, and become a proper man finally. Here’s a few steps I have taken to realize this goal.

    1-Daily shaves – I used to have a hipster beard which made me feel like a total loser. For last six months, I have been shaving almost daily. That too with a straight razor and an alum block.

    2- Controlled the smoking habit

    3- Reduced alcohol intake

    4- Stopped trying to fit in – Earlier it used to be always about getting attention from others. I am slowly trying to squeeze that habit into a trashcan.

    5- No more social media – I have deleted my Facebook account for good. I don’t hang out in and around stupid websites anymore.

    6- I have traveled a lot to broaden my mind. But that purusit of adrenalin is all but gone.

    I wasn’t a man-child alway. Between the ages of 23 and 24, I used to be the best version of myself. That was when I stepped out of my home first, lost my virginity, heeded my inner calling for travel and just took plain responsibilities for my actions. That phase of live got over in like six months. But I do REMEMBER how it used to feel to be a man, for a change.

    I just want to revive that phase again. And get rid of this inner man-child for good. I also want to be in a relationship with an actual woman.

    Thank you for reading.

    1. Wow Sid! I really appreciate your honesty. I hear you man. I will be 46 in two weeks and I feel like maybe finally I have killed the man-child within.

      Here’s some new developments that have helped me kill the man-child:

      Stopped rocking back and forth like an Autistic child: This was a 37 year habit that I started while watching the muppets when I was 8. I was addicted to the movement and used it to cope with stress. Since I have an addictive personality I found myself rocking up to 14 hours a day. I haven’t rocked now for two months and feel more grounded and can look into people’s eyes longer.

      Connected with Jesus: I setted up a large picture of Jesus in a small room of our house and sit and look at him and ask him for wisdom and guidance and thank him for my clean heart. Just the act of getting alone with God is powerful and staring into Jesus’s eyes is another fast way to get rid of any shyness around people – because we are all children of God, so if you dis humans you’re dissing God basically. So, that is also teaching me compassion and empathy towards my fellow man and makes me feel more a part of humanity.

      Moved into an Actual house – I had lived in converted school buses for 20 years and always felt like an underground punk living that way, had to haul in water and other things, so I felt cool and alternative doing it in my Twenties, but now in my 40’s living in a bus just knocked my self-worth down. Living in an actual house also makes me feel like a man, especially since it’s right near the national forest and we have wild animals and the house needs maintanance which allows me to use manly tools to fix it and feel manly.

      More Income – As my business takes off I have more money to provide for my household and fix things and go out to dinner once in awhile.

      No more porn or masturbating – This has been the hardest thing to quit, but the more I watch preachers on Youtube and connect to God, the more dirty porn feels. Also, my wife knows I watch porn and I don’t want her to feel bad during our intimacy, and masturbation desensitizes us and makes it hard to go all the way with a real woman. Get rid of porn asap, those images burn a hole in your conscience!

      Thanks for your comment Sid. You are a real man, no fake poser man would leave such an insightful and honest and vulnerable comment like you did!


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